Nathan: 11 Months

A month ago I was really struggling with the fact that you are almost one. I was having the hardest time looking at you looking so grown up. Now a month later I am more excited than sad. I needed that couple weeks of holding you extra tight and soaking in what is left of you being a baby. Now I am excited to celebrate your birth in one month! I get excited watching you learn to crawl up the stairs and pull yourself to stand. I anxiously wait to hear your first word and to watch you learn to crawl. I am excited to see the relationship you will have with Everett. I want to enjoy this last month of you being our sweet baby and not be sad that you are growing up.

You have started biting me. You bite my shoulder mostly but recently have started my arm too. It is usually when you are excited and hungry at the same time.
I thought you were getting stubborn when it came to bum and clothing changes but now it is getting a bit ridiculous and impossible. At one point the other day I was yelling for Everett to come in and help hold you down.
When Everett takes a toy from you it is so sad but hilarious. You start screaming and get so upset. I am starting to wonder if you are going to be my wild child.
I am obsessed with smelling you. My favorite place to smell you is on the side of your head above your ear. I especially love smelling you when you wake up.
Watching you open your mouth for food is so fun. You open so wide like a baby bird.
Lately I can't stop looking at how beautiful you are.
You have learned to pull yourself to stand and are getting really fast at it. One day you stood up without any help and then fell right back down. I give it another month or two and you will be walking.
Your nickname is still bubba but sometimes Everett calls you bubsy.
My favorite thing is nursing you until you are asleep. You are usually only tired enough to fall asleep nursing for your morning nap. I just love it.
You have a toy drawer in the bathroom that is meant to distract you from playing with the toilet that you for some reason are so interested in.
We lowered your crib this month now that you have learned to pull yourself up.
You also learned how to crawl up the stairs. The first time and one other time it has been when we didn't know you were doing it. We need to start keeping a closer eye on you.
You usually leave my lemon tree alone but one morning you decided a big mouthful of dirt would be delicious.
You don't like being thrown up in the air like Everett did as a baby.
You have the sweetest relationship with your dad. I love when you smile at him and then look down.
For whatever reason you love crawling around with something hanging from your mouth.
I trimmed your mullet off. It is very uneven now but looks so much better. I am not brave enough yet to trim the sides or front of your hair.
I am completely obsessed with your toothy grin.
You aren't saying any words yet but you sure babble a lot and seem to have a lot to say.
You are still nursing once or twice a night. I just can't give in and make you give them up. I love the closeness and cuddles to much even though I am so exhausted getting up to do it.

January

The new year has been good to us. My heart has been full of love this month. I have loved watching my boys play together. I love watching Everett come in after bath most nights to kiss Nathan goodnight. I love watching the boys wrestle dad on the bed and of course just like Everett started wrestling dad super young Nathan is already joining in on the fun. Whenever I get mixed in with the wrestling Everett will give me a hug instead because he knows I don't like to wrestle. The love I have for this family of mine is so strong and real. Sometimes I wonder how I can even contain all of this love for them inside of me. Everett and Nathan are developing such a sweet and brotherly love for each other. I am so thankful to have Stephen as my companion for not only this life but for eternity. He is so good for me. I have been thinking over and over lately how I am so in love with my life right now. Even with all of the chaos that is always around. I am focusing this year on slowing down, saying no to the unnecessary things, and living in each moment I am given.

We signed back up for the gym now that Nathan is crawling and big enough for the play room.

Church is at 9:00 this year which has been so nice. We can all have afternoon naps now. Everett is a sunbeam in primary which makes him seem so old. He only cried the first week because he wanted to go to nursery instead. Now he is loving it and loves his friends in his class.
Stephen and I had a nice date night when he got free tickets to the symphony.

On the days Everett didn't have preschool we spent the days in our pajamas staying warm.
Stephen woke me up one night to watch the blood moon eclipse. It was freezing cold but so incredible to see.
Luckily this winter has been mild enough for us to get out and go on some walks every couple weeks.

Nathan: 10 Months

Today as I took your ten month pictures it was the first time I looked at you and I didn't see my baby anymore. The love I have for you cannot be written or explained. It is so strong it makes my heart want to burst. My post pardon journey with you has been amazing. I think about it so much. The light, joy, and happiness I have felt with you overwhelms me. Within seconds after you were born I felt this overwhelming feeling of being complete. You were immediately placed on my chest and stayed there for what seemed liked hours. I never wanted to let you go. You nursed right away and with no problem. Not once have you ever had an issue with nursing. You have always known that mom has your food and you have always wanted it. I remember the first few days of your life dad and I would take three hour blocks holding you so you wouldn't have to go in your rocker. I don't remember the lack of sleep. All I remember is the closeness we shared. I love you Nathan so fiercely. It breaks my heart a little to see you grow so quickly. Although I know what is ahead of us from raising your wonderful big brother. So many incredible and fun milestones are awaiting us. I look forward to them and also want them to come as slowly as possible. This first year of your life is one I will cherish forever.
Your favorite bath toy is an ice cream cone. The second you are in the tub you lunge for it. I think you like it so much because you can sneak bath water from it.

When you are hungry and tired you bite my shoulder and sometimes really hard.

My favorite smile of yours is when your entire face just squishes.

You like dropping things and then dropping them again and again after we give them back to you.

The hardwood floors are not very soft for your learning to crawl on.

Any time the fridge door opens you stop whatever you are doing and crawl as fast as you can to get to it.
While changing your diaper one day I found a pacifier in your sleeper. You don't even like pacifiers.
For a few days you were super gassy when you nursed.
One of my favorite things is after you nurse you will nestle into my shoulder while I rock you. Those cuddles and loves are amazing.
Every time I lay you in bed for a nap or bedtime I always rub your head, then your back all the way to your bum, and end at your feet.
Oh my word you are making the cutest baby noises lately. This high pitch cooing and giggling sound.
Another thing I found in your sleeper when I was changing you one morning, a dryer sheet. It was in the foot of your sleeper.
Sometimes when you sit you will cross your legs. It is adorable.
I honestly don't know what it is but I just love smelling you. I can't get enough. I especially love smelling your head.
I was holding you and your toy fell onto the floor. You broke out laughing out loud. It was so incredible. I immediately put you down and Everett and I continued dropping the toys on the floor while listening to you laugh.
Watching you crawl to the bath naked is so adorable. You get so excited.
Everett likes calling you Bubs. Every day when he gets in the car from preschool pickup he says hi Bubs.
The worst thing you started doing is grinding your teeth. It is only when you are eating but it is terrible and makes me cringe.
I love how you chomp onto toys.
You've started banging your head on the back of your highchair. Everett did the same thing as a baby.
You make this sweet little sound almost like you are trying to say something. It sounds like bwah and its like you are blowing something.
You are starting to realize you can pull yourself to stand. It won't be long now until you are doing it all of the time.
Nathan I honestly wish this baby stage could last another year. I am not ready for you to turn one in a couple months and start walking and talking and grow up. I have enjoyed this stage with you so dearly. You have the sweetest little spirit. You have a spunk and fire in you that is contagious. I can already tell you are going to do great things. I see a lot of your dad in you. You are stubborn and fierce. We love you so much Nathan.